Most people who know me would probably say I am outspoken, opinionated and sometimes pretty stubborn. I try to be kind and respectful but I’m pretty sure no one would describe me as sweet or quiet. I’m ok with that. I often end up in lengthy conversations or even arguments with people over topics that I feel are important. When “topics” become people I’m a little less…not sure the word here… patient maybe, and no less quiet. I often am asked why I bother. Why do I spend time arguing with people who will “never change”? Why do I let it consume me? Part of the answer is that it is true that I occasionally should walk away and come back or drop it but I am stubborn. The other part is because how I grew up, where I grew up, and what I have seen has given me a unique perspective. I’m not saying I am special. You see, I have a secret that I was always too ashamed to admit. Now I am realizing that this is the exact time to talk about it and instead of being ashamed, I can start to talk about what I learned and be (proud isn’t exactly the right word) better and do something with it.
I am a member of Generation X. People forget about us. You often hear about Boomers and Millennials but our smaller in between population of Generation Xers is often forgotten. We are the latchkey kids. We basically raised ourselves. Our moms joined the workforce and our parents didn’t have a ton of money (not the money we ended up having when we became adults at least) so there wasn’t a big Nanny movement. We pretty much raised ourselves. For many of us that was a huge benefit. We learned a lot and became adaptable. We basically invented everything people use today including all of the technology you’re using right now. We were problem solvers. We had to figure out how to navigate everything on our own. Children born in the 60s and 70s grew up in the 80s and 90s. Weird times. The 80s and 90s could have been 40 years apart based on the differences between them. I could keep going because it is a pretty fascinating topic but that would be a different article. Bottom line is that we were often without guidance.
I graduated high school in 1994 from a public school in the Poconos. Sounds lovely enough, right? The Poconos. The “Mountains”. Lakes….so pretty! I wasn’t born in the Poconos. My parents moved there from the Philly suburb of Upper Darby to give their kids a chance at a better life and get away from some of the things that were tearing apart our neighborhood (drugs,etc.). So I was a teenager in the Poconos in the early 90s.
Two major things happened in the early 90s.
1. The start of a giant housing and loan scam aimed to take advantage of low income people from New York and New Jersey (aka people of color) by promising a new and perfect life at a low cost in the beautiful Pocono Mountains. Look it up. It’s a real thing.
2. Skinheads. Look it up. It’s a real thing. Continue reading